Tuesday, August 08, 2006

Ikea Nightmare

For better or worse I purchased my first piece of Ikea furniture today. I just moved into a new place and needed something for the books and clothes. Solution… 5 x 5 cubbyhole bookshelf.

My room is on the small side so I decided to assemble the bookshelf in the front room and move it into the bedroom once built. The bookshelf came in three heavy ass boxes and with a million pieces (maybe two million). Within 15 minutes the bookshelf was starting to take form. In my head I was literally thinking, “this has to be some kind of record for putting this together.” Right after I said that to myself, Jade (roommate), walks into the room and asks, “How the fuck are you getting that monstrosity in your room?”
For whatever reason I was positive it would squeeze down the tiny hallway, around the sharp corner and into the doorway. I took the top board (which hadn’t been assembled) and tried turning the corner with it. DOH! One inch too long. I was 80% finished!

I sat there for a good ten minutes trying to figure out what the F to do. Taking it apart would be a complete disaster. Moving it as is was not an option (fall apart). So I decided to take it in the room in five sections. Once the sections were in the room it was just a matter of piecing it back together. Easier said than done. All I had to do was put the wood pegs in the hole (always been a problem for me). Problem was… there were seven unstable pieces with pegs that had to be placed in the hole(s) at the same time. Adding to the level of difficulty was the fact that it was now sitting on a carpet that was uneven.
I’d place a couple pegs in and the others would fall out. Then I’d place the ones that just fell out back in and others would fall out. This went on for 20 minutes or so. I was dripping sweat, my blood was boiling and I was on the verge of going postal. Finally I swallowed my pride and asked Jade for some reinforcement to stabilize the boards. In the end it all worked out, but… serious pain in the ass. Granted its Ikea furniture… it looks good, the price was right and it’s serving its purpose.